With the abortion debate in the background and the ever-increasing numbers of aborted children in Spain, it is pertinent to listen to the voice of those who suffer the most from this drama: mothers. Thus, today we recover the interview with Leire Navaridas, mother of three, who had an abortion when she was barely 26 years old.. After a long process of forgiveness and healing, Leire fights tirelessly for the rights of the unborn child and the womb that carries it. “No society is going to advance and progress if it does not defend life, especially that of the most vulnerable,” she says.
Does a 26-year-old girl have an abortion knowingly?
It depends on the values and love with which you have been raised and the information you have, and not only on intrauterine life, but on what it means to be a mother. For me the greatest gift in life. In my case, I became pregnant in a context of very little affection and quite a bit of insensitivity. Even if it was with my stable partner, even if we were married, there was a great disconnection between body and heart. I had been raised in a culture where life is not sacred, man is the enemy, where abortion is a right and “we give birth, we decide” is fair. I also went to have an abortion with the idea that it was harmless and a means to maintain the independence of women, especially with respect to men.
When did the knowledge of what an abortion truly is come to you?
I started having vertigo in college, I was living abroad and had some new episodes. Upon returning to Spain, after starting therapy, and with a lot of introspection work, I was able to be aware and face the pain of the loss of my first two children, one violently and the other spontaneously. I had always lived a life from the outside, with little internal sensitivity. I had a very busy social schedule but hardly had any inner privacy. Lots of parties, drugs, promiscuity in sexuality, etc. He came from a pretty destructive background. That’s why when I got pregnant I thought about my life as I had planned it, and not about my son. A friend, with all her good intentions, recommended that I have an abortion. She wanted to help me, I know. But it is part of the immense social engineering that she has sold that abortion is a harmless solution, without consequences. Nobody told me that the problem was not the child I was expecting but the deep loneliness that a mother faces. There is a lot of loneliness, fear, uncertainty…
Does abortion end motherhood?
As soon as there is pregnancy there is a mother, just like a father. And this is rejected. You can see very well in the movie “The Silent Scream” all the social engineering that began in the 70s in the United States. An engineering that made a large part of American society go from seeing abortion as the murder of a child to recognizing it as a woman’s right. With the complicity of the feminist leader of the moment, women’s will was placed at the center of the social debate. They thought about how to sell that abortion was something positive and they saw the right to choose the perfect path: Who is going to be against a woman deciding freely? But I ask myself: decide on what? Motherhood cannot be chosen, it is a deception, a fallacy. The pregnant woman is a mother and there is no possible choice except to have a living or dead child.
What was the path like between the abortion of your child and the recognition of your motherhood? When did you put a face to it?
It is a long process that begins with self-recognition. As you enter into that truth, you find all the dimensions of your being: physical, emotional, passionate, intellectual and spiritual. That last dimension failed me because I was super atheist, I had never believed in what is not seen and religious beliefs seemed ridiculous to me. But that dimension, as you go deeper and get to know yourself better, overcoming mental limits, inevitably appears. In my case, I began to recognize my spiritual side and it undoubtedly helped me face the trauma of abortion, because without it abortion has no solution or consolation. Little by little I acquired a transcendence that made me see that we had not given my son the opportunity to be born. I will never be able to hug and kiss my aborted son, as I do with my third child. However, that bond of love, respect and affection that you deserve, of being unique and unrepeatable, is there. My unborn children have names and I still love them very much, they fill my heart. But it was with that spiritual awareness that I was finally able to face the trauma of abortion and begin reconstruction. I continued to have a lot of guilt for that cruel and heartless act for which I believed myself responsible. Over time I realized that I was also a victim because no one supported me with love, no one informed me adequately, no one squeezed my hand and recognized the wonderful thing about giving life to a child. In my case, neither the institutions, nor my partner, nor my family… Nobody thought that that abortion was a mistake.
How did forgiveness come?
Forgiveness doesn’t come to you, you have to give it to yourself. They had already forgiven me everywhere. Children forgive us, life forgives us, people with conscience and sensitivity know the drama we go through. I didn’t need forgiveness from others. Forgiveness is either given by oneself or there is nothing to do. It helped me to project my story onto another woman and seeing all the suffering I gained strength and forgave myself and began to rebel against the system itself. And from that indignation has come all my fight and dedication to make publicly visible the horror and error behind abortion.
The pro-life defense is often Catholic and conservative. Can life be defended from atheism and the left?
It is a question of sensibilities and sensitivity does not understand political ideology. In fact, until now it was thought that the conservatives defended life but Feijóo has spoken on behalf of the PP and it seems that the conservatives do little to defend life when many votes are at stake. Although well, without being a conservative, it seems daring to call the PP a pro-life reference. In fact, Gallardón at the time wanted to introduce a law more sensitive to the reality of the surrogate mother and after a calculation of votes they pointed the door to him. There we can see that the defense of life is not a conservative flag, but rather one of people with sensitivity.
Now, it is true that the lack of spiritual connection that atheism generates (in favor of the purely intellectual) makes the defense of life difficult because they do not understand the human dimension on a spiritual level. But the scientific reality remains true that a pregnant mother who allows herself to be violently involved in her pregnancy is ending the life of her child. So you don’t have to be a believer to know the reality of abortion.
Pope Francis recently said that there is nothing more progressive than defending life…
You are absolutely right. No society will advance and progress if it does not defend life, especially that of the most vulnerable. In Spain we live on both sides, yes, and not even in the defense of life, which should be universal, have we managed to reach an agreement.
This defense of life was undertaken by Vox in Castilla y León, with its fetal heartbeat proposal. Among many criticisms, you have publicly defended her. Does listening to the fetal heartbeat save lives?
For me, the most fundamental thing about this issue is the information it offers to the mother who wants an abortion. This measure makes women go to abort knowing that they do not have inside a mass of cells but a human life, and more specifically, that of their son or daughter. When you listen to a heart the impact is indelible. It’s a pum-pum incredible that brings to consciousness all the transcendence of motherhood, it is the sound of life within you. That’s why hearing the heartbeat makes the mother at least know the truth. Denying information to an adult woman is a regrettable paternalism that does not make the IVE (Violent Pregnancy Intervention) any less traumatic.
Now, this law is not enough. It’s good but more is needed. Because there are many women who are forced to abort even though they know that they are carrying their child in their womb. However, the threat that pushes women to such a dramatic option is not resolved only with awareness of intrauterine life. Therefore, in addition to providing information, it is necessary to provide support, and I believe that this fails in the law.
A few months ago we learned, thirteen years later, the resolution of the Constitutional Court that endorses Zapatero’s deadline law. A law that allows abortions for children with Down syndrome up to five and a half months…
Anyway. I find it regrettable. For me this resolution has been the representation of a cowardly and paternalistic act. I think that with this we put the focus back on the interests of the abortion industry and not on the needs of the pregnant woman. That is why I totally reject this law and the people who continue to support laws that show insensitivity and inhumanity.
There is hope?
There are many good people who are working tirelessly in defense of life and helping pregnant women. I have been with a group of mothers for two years now, whom I accompany in their post-abortion trauma, and it has been wonderful to know the processes of these women who go from victims to heroines. There are mothers who help other mothers and that is exciting. I have been contacted by women on the verge of suicide and thanks to the group we have formed, “Postabortion Union”, many of them have recovered the illusion of their motherhood, of loving and being loved.
