Having a negative relationship with your partner’s mother can lead to serious problems, including a breakup.
And the mother-in-law has not always enjoyed popularity, since by being attentive to her children they end up being described as meddlesome, controlling, reckless and conflictive, explains psychologist Vanessa Armendáriz.
The specialist assures that the relationship between daughters-in-law and mothers-in-law can have a conflictive tone, and to avoid this, limits must be set.
“Clear strategies and rules must be established to have a good coexistence that does not affect the couple or family relationship,” he says.
Armendáriz mentions that daughters-in-law should pay attention to the criticism they receive from mothers-in-law, and that they only keep the good and what it will contribute to themselves or to the relationship.
He points out that when a conflict occurs, it is necessary to take a few minutes to reflect on a possible response, be calm and then defend your ideas before others.
“This attitude will be very helpful, because it will convince others and thus a faster solution will be reached,” he points out.
Likewise, you must carry out a self-analysis and fully understand who is causing the problem. The objective is to change attitudes to have a cordial relationship.
The specialist indicates that you should avoid responding in the same way that the couple’s mother does, because this will worsen the relationship.
“We have to be empathetic with the mother-in-law because we need to understand the reason why she takes these attitudes, and it is likely that this has to do with some habit she had with her son and now it is different,” he says.
Another important aspect is to stop the approval of the mother-in-lawsince at the beginning what is sought is to gain their affection and trust, and this conditions the future when making decisions.
In every situation, he recommends that there be respect, consideration and kindness, in order to gain trust.
Let everything flow, let nothing influence
Every relationship has a limit and mental health must be taken care of.
If the relationship with your mother-in-law is not prosperous, the ideal is not to force the bond. However, the couple should not be forced to choose between love and the woman who gave them life.
“We cannot pressure or decide for the couple, much less force them than break the bond with their mother. It should only be respected and supported,” says the expert.
